Tips for Overcoming Fatigue
In a recent survey I conducted, I learned that the #1 OBSTACLE TO SEXUAL INTIMACY WITH HUSBAND IS FATIGUE. It is my personal opinion (I can’t prove it) that women tend to experience fatigue more than men. There are many reasons for it like kids, hormones, less sleep, inability for deep sleep, and the way women handle stress. Men have higher testosterone (which often translates into more energy), different ways of handling stress, and tend to sleep really well. At least, I know my husband does. 🙂
Tips for Overcoming Fatigue
#1 Examine your wellness lifestyle. Blood tests can reveal if you have low thyroid activity, low iron, low vitamin D or other deficiencies that might cause low energy levels. Are you exercising? Eating enough protein? Do you try to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep? I know that can be impossible at times. But know that God will honor your efforts to care for you body for Him and your husband.
#2 Schedule sex. This might be necessary with small children. It might not sound very romantic, but if you schedule sex, you can arrange a quick cat nap that day or have a “light” day of activity so you are rested for that night. You can spice things up by different positions, oral sex, and more.
#3 Beware of time thieves. Watching your favorite show past bedtime. Staying on Facebook until too tired for sex. Get kids in bed early enough to relax and enjoy your spouse. We have a habit of choosing other things above sex with our spouse.
#4 Take advantage of the weekend. Men’s testosterone and sex drive is higher on the weekends. Take advantage of that and have sex at other times other than night when you’re exhausted. If you have small children, arrange with another young family to watch each others’ kids for some mommy and daddy time. Or hit the grandparents up if possible.
#5 Create sexportunities. Have sex during the kids’ nap times. Instead of going out on your date night stay in and having amazing sex. Have sex before the kids wake up. Take advantage of those opportunities.
#6 Spice it up. Think throughout the day what positions you want to try and text the ideas to your spouse (make sure you are your spouse and not accidentally sending to someone else!). Get some flavored lotions for oral sex. Plan an erotic massage. Purchase some toys.
#7 Meditate on your spouse and past enjoyable sexual encounters. This was advice I gave a new couple to help a woman overcome pain during intercourse. She would think about her husband sexually throughout the day and be primed (literally) and ready to go when he got home! As you think in your heart, so are you. Make sex a priority.
#8 Just do it. Pun intended. Deep kissing and fondling can get the juices flowing. It’s similar to what I tell my personal training clients. Go workout even when tired. HAVE SEX EVEN IF TIRED. The more sex you have with your spouse, the more you will be in the mood. The less you have, the less you will be in the mood.
#9 Have a sex vacation. Plan a weekend vacation to get away. No kids. And focus on spending
quality time together in and out of the sheets but mostly in the sheets! Not only will it help fuel your drive after, but it will also create memories of intense pleasure that will affect your body’s chemistry leading to more sex!
We all do things even when we are tired because we have to. We have to cook dinner. We have to shower. We have to clean our house. We have to do laundry. YOU MUST REFRAME SEX AS A MUST FOR A HEALTHY MARRIAGE.