Sex Begins in the Secret Place
Sex was designed by God and is intensely spiritual. Within the context of marriage, marriage is honorable and sex undefiled.
Hebrews 13:4 (NKJV)
4 Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.
Honorable in the Greek means “of high price” and “costly” like precious gems. Undefiled means “that which has nothing in it that defiles, unpolluted, unstained, unsoiled, undefiled by sin”
(Complete Word Study Dictionary, The – The Complete Word Study Dictionary – New Testament). Sex within marriage has NOTHING IN IT THAT DEFILES. SHAME HAS NO PLACE IN THE BEDROOM. Shame came after the fall and is a lie the enemy has done a good job spreading even within Christian marriages.
Your Vibrant Relationship with God Equals Vibrant Sex Life
If there is one activity that sexual union within marriage represents in the Christian’s life, it is COMMUNION WITH GOD IN PRAYER. Let me prove it to you.
Genesis 3:8 (NKJV)
8 And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden.
In the original language of scripture, this verse literally means “the voice of the Lord God flowing in the garden in the wind of the day.” In John 3:8-11, Jesus and Nicodemus have a very strange conversation.
John 3:8-11 (NKJV)
8 The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear the sound of it, but cannot tell where it comes from and where it goes. So is everyone who is born of the Spirit.”
9 Nicodemus answered and said to Him, “How can these things be?”
10 Jesus answered and said to him, “Are you the teacher of Israel, and do not know these things?
11 Most assuredly, I say to you, We speak what We know and testify what We have seen, and you do not receive Our witness.
The reason Jesus said, “Are you a teacher of Israel, and do not know these things?” is because He was alluding to Genesis 3:8 (I find it VERY INTERESTING that both Genesis and John speaking of the Spirit of God like a wind are both chapter 3 verse 8). Jesus was saying that one must be born again TO BE RESTORED TO THE INTIMACY ENJOYED BEFORE THE FALL OF MAN.
Where Shame Entered
Genesis 3:9-10 (NKJV)
9 Then the LORD God called to Adam and said to him, “Where are you?”
10 So he said, “I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself.”
This is the first place in scripture where a NAKED BODY brought fear and shame and that has been the case every since. Now that you are BORN AGAIN, THERE SHOULD BE NO SHAME OVER YOUR BODY NO MATTER YOUR PERCEPTION OF IT.
What is the Secret Place?
Matthew 6:6 (NKJV)
6 But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly.
Room in the Greek speaks of any place where there is privacy. Both UNRESTRAINED PRAYER and UNRESTRAINED SEX are designed for privacy. You need a place to let go of all restraints in fervent prayer so you can go deep, and you also need a place to let go of all restraints and have incredible, intoxicating sex!
PRAYER SHOULD NOT BE BORING. Religion has reduced prayer to boring petitions that last about 30 seconds to 5 minutes. But fervent, Holy Spirit anointed, vibrant prayer leads to ENCOUNTER with God (over the next few weeks in December 2015 and possibly longer, I am teaching on prayer at the furnace, which you can access the videos on this site).
Scientifically Supported Benefits of Prayer
- Prayer improves self-control. Scientists have found that prayer before mentally exhaustive tasks results in better self-control after. If you have ever been tired and fussy, you know your self-control takes a hit. An intimate relationship with God keeps your spirit in control not your emotions or body. As stated in blog post titled, “Divinely Designed for Sex,” both men and women are in a continual state of arousal. Prayer helps each spouse use self-control is sexual desire.
- Prayer helps reduce aggression. I.e. you are nicer. It is a bit hard to be a jerk right after prayer unless prayer was dead and boring. Researchers have found praying especially after an anger-inducing experience helped a lot.
- Prayer helps you forgive. Research has found that when you pray for your spouse, you are better able to forgive him. Could this be why the Bible says not to let the sun go down on your wrath? It’s hard to sleep next to your spouse much less have sex when you are ticked.
- Prayer increases trust. Praying with your spouse increases trust in your spouse. You are engaging your spirit-man together as well as emotionally. All that is left is physical!
- Prayer buffers stress in your life. Philippians says that when we prayer specifically with thanksgiving, PEACE GUARDS OUR HEARTS. Science has proven this is true.
- Prayer makes you a better person. Studies have shown that praying reduces the level of one’s ego affecting the area of the brain associated with emotion. People who pray are less greedy and more humble. This can be important because if sex is controlled, it can become a weapon or make a person feel used only for sex.
- Prayer makes you happier. Prayer releases the pleasure hormone, dopamine, which is also released during sex. It makes you happier and more peaceful. I don’t know if you have noticed that good sex also makes you happier and more peaceful.
Summary
I hope you see the UNDENIABLE CORRELATION OF SEX AND PRAYER and how prayer can enhance your sex as well as your relationship with your husband. Any Christian who has a healthy prayer life will put her spouse above herself and him above himself. Sex will become an act to create pleasure for the other not a selfish act of gratification.